Married and bisexual
“I’m a bi man. Married to a woman. Yes, that&#;s one of the options!”
I was a teenager, slowly realising there was something different about me. One day, I wonder – am I gay? And I think no. I’m a boy, and I’m definitely attracted to girls. Okay, cool. No need to stress out.
Steffan Alun performing on stage in Stand-Up Sesh
After leaving school, I met a girl that I liked, we eventually started a relationship, and now – fifteen years later – we’re married. Simple.
But then, a several years ago, it slap me – I’m double attraction. That explained all those weird feelings I’d had as a teenager. And, let’s be honest, the occasional crush on a handsome celebrity even today.
For a while, I didn’t bother telling anyone. What was the point? I was married – and very happy with my wife. Why would anyone care? Why should I even care?
But here’s the thing. Sexuality is an enormous facet of the human experience. It’s a huge part of our identities. Don’t we care for gossiping about an attractive new colleague, or a sexy pop star? I realised that, for most of my life, I’d deliberately steered around converse
I’m Bisexual, I’m Married, and I Want to Scout My Sexuality. ‘Does That Make Me a Stereotype?’
Not to be cheesy, but your only job is to be yourself.
This is Real Sex, Real Answers: An advice column that understands that sex and sexuality is complicated, and worth chatting about openly and without stigma — and that, sometimes, that means reaching out to a stranger on the internet for help.
Rachel Charlene Lewis is a long-time reader and journalist within the sexual wellness space, and is never not talking about sexuality. So why not unite the conversation?
I touch like more and more, I hear about bisexuals being greedy and “slutty” and not knowing what they want. It’s an awful, harmful stereotype. I know that. But what if it’s… true? For me?
I’m married (monogamous) and I want to investigate my sexuality, and it’s pretty much a nightmare come to life. I don’t want to grant any more validity to a stereotype that has made my life, and the life of pansexual people, hard for so long. But I also feel like I’m denying myself the right to be who I am, which just might be a messy bisexual.
Do I hold my feelings in a
I Realized I Was Bi After 13 Years of Marriage. Here's What Happened
I fell in love with Emily four years ago. I’d just turned 40 and she bounced her way over to me at a kid’s birthday party at a local bounce house. Our kids were in the matching class at school, and we’d been to a bunch of the alike parties and seen each other at drop-off. But we had never really chatted.
We quickly realized we both loved soccer and decided to join a team together. The monitoring weekend, we went out for postgame drinks and stayed until the lock closed. We just couldn’t stop talking.
Quickly, we fell into the routine of texting all day, every day, and it gave me constant butterflies. I wrote it off as “new friend excitement.” When it didn’t subside, I started to wonder, Do I have a love interest on this woman? I told no one and spent many nights staring at the ceiling wondering what was going on with me. After a couple weeks of grabbing drinks after soccer and doing playdates with the kids in the park, we scheduled a gleeful hour. On the afternoon of our meeting, she texted that her daughter was sick and needed to cancel. I was devastated. I realized in that moment, Should my friend canceling a elated
I'm a bisexual woman married to a man. People questioning my sexuality caused me to come out queer instead.
I grew up in a home where I was frequently told it was OK to be gay, so I never had a formal coming out. I simply brought my first girlfriend home. Of course, it confused my family who had known me as a boy-crazy teenager. But the surprise quickly faded, and I continued to date men and women as a young adult.
But in , I met my now husband who immediately accepted my bisexuality. I felt so content because I could declare my sexuality while existence comfortable in my partnership. People outside my bond, though, criticized me for identifying as bisexual but choosing to settle down with a man.
I vividly remember the first second I was told I didn't count as a queer person
I play rugby, which intersects with the queer community. Years ago, on the sidelines of a game, my teammates were trying to think who was queer.
I told them I was pansexual, and I'll never dismiss their reactions. "You don't count," one said. "Yeah, you picked a side," said another, referring to my husband.
Coming from gender non-conforming people, this felt love an irrefutable truth, and it meant I wasn't par 
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I Realized I Was Bi After 13 Years of Marriage. Here's What Happened
I fell in love with Emily four years ago. I’d just turned 40 and she bounced her way over to me at a kid’s birthday party at a local bounce house. Our kids were in the matching class at school, and we’d been to a bunch of the alike parties and seen each other at drop-off. But we had never really chatted. I grew up in a home where I was frequently told it was OK to be gay, so I never had a formal coming out. I simply brought my first girlfriend home. Of course, it confused my family who had known me as a boy-crazy teenager. But the surprise quickly faded, and I continued to date men and women as a young adult. But in , I met my now husband who immediately accepted my bisexuality. I felt so content because I could declare my sexuality while existence comfortable in my partnership. People outside my bond, though, criticized me for identifying as bisexual but choosing to settle down with a man. I play rugby, which intersects with the queer community. Years ago, on the sidelines of a game, my teammates were trying to think who was queer. I told them I was pansexual, and I'll never dismiss their reactions. "You don't count," one said. "Yeah, you picked a side," said another, referring to my husband. Coming from gender non-conforming people, this felt love an irrefutable truth, and it meant I wasn't par .
We quickly realized we both loved soccer and decided to join a team together. The monitoring weekend, we went out for postgame drinks and stayed until the lock closed. We just couldn’t stop talking.
Quickly, we fell into the routine of texting all day, every day, and it gave me constant butterflies. I wrote it off as “new friend excitement.” When it didn’t subside, I started to wonder, Do I have a love interest on this woman? I told no one and spent many nights staring at the ceiling wondering what was going on with me. After a couple weeks of grabbing drinks after soccer and doing playdates with the kids in the park, we scheduled a gleeful hour. On the afternoon of our meeting, she texted that her daughter was sick and needed to cancel. I was devastated. I realized in that moment, Should my friend canceling a elated
I'm a bisexual woman married to a man. People questioning my sexuality caused me to come out queer instead.
I vividly remember the first second I was told I didn't count as a queer person